"Daddy gets silly! whuhuhu" this is exactly what Clarence told his mom.. hahaha.. I don't know what came into me but I found myself teasing my son so hard. It started when he didn’t listen to what I asked him to do. Whatever he acts, I mimic him until I annoyed him so much and began to cry... then my cruelty doesn’t end there, I still continue copying what he does, how he cries, how he stomps and worse giving exaggeration in it.. I ignore him saying “stop!” I was like a little maniac who kept on pissing him off, survival of the fittest, I said to myself.. haha.. we’re both screaming as I followed every pitch of his cry.. not minding the grumpy old man living upstairs. Then my wife woke up and gave us a fiery look as if she’s trying to tell me something that I should’ve known right from the very start. That’s her power, just one look, a strong hidden message hehe.. Oh well, that’s my signal to stop. My son hurriedly went towards her and surprisingly said that phrase. Surprised because I didn’t know how he will tell to her mom what I did… Usually, he’ll go to his mom crying, “Daddy got mad!” but today is different, he made his description of what had happened so funny. He just perceived it as silliness whereas I’m expecting him to say that “we had a fight”. For I know I got him real good. It’s not my intention to make him cry, it’s just that my son is really irresistibly cute for me that I wanted to tease him and have fun with him. I believe it’s better to get silly than to get mad. You know, child heart! Everyone has it.
Showing posts with label child. Show all posts
Showing posts with label child. Show all posts
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Monday, July 20, 2009
Let's Do the Safety Check!
We already taught our son how to cross the road inside our apartment complex but we still can’t be sure of his safety from some reckless drivers. Yesterday when we sent Lorie to work, (we usually walk her to the train station and played in the park afterwards) we were walking slowly in the parking lot when suddenly a man started backing up his car when we were just a yard away from his rear. If Lorie didn’t shout which alarmed the driver, I don’t know what terrible could happen. We’re too big for the driver not to be seen at the back of his car. He just wave like he’s trying to apologize but he still continues driving as if it’s not a big deal. I’m waiting for him to get off the car and check if there’s something went wrong with us, but he didn’t. We were still shocked then and didn’t think of arguing or getting his plate number. All our concern has been brought to our son if he’s okay. We got so scared of thinking the horrible things that might have happened when the man continued backing up. As of now, we’re all okay. Thank God. I know He was there to protect us.
Whenever my son and I are outside I don’t let him get too far away from me, I’m always a meter away from him when walking in the sidewalk. I think I’m getting so paranoid, always thinking that someone might get him from me haha. I love my son so much, that’s why! And when we are about to cross the road, he knows the rule, I just need to say “Okay.. safety check!!!” and he will respond, “Stop! Look and Listen!!!” in a singing mode… He’s now looking on both sides making sure that it’s clear to cross, but sometimes, I still need to remind him. There’s one time, I forgot to do the routine because I can see from afar that it’s safe to cross, he cautioned me, “Daddy, Stoooppp! Stop! Look and Listen first!!!!” hahaha… followed up by saying “That’s dangewoouuss..!” Oh well, I said, “oh, I’m sorry, I forgot about our safety check!”. That’s just one instance, but now when we’re out I always make sure that we do this practice constantly. It’s like making him responsible in a fun and easy way he’ll like it. I believe everybody should have their own safety patrol anywhere and anytime.
Whenever my son and I are outside I don’t let him get too far away from me, I’m always a meter away from him when walking in the sidewalk. I think I’m getting so paranoid, always thinking that someone might get him from me haha. I love my son so much, that’s why! And when we are about to cross the road, he knows the rule, I just need to say “Okay.. safety check!!!” and he will respond, “Stop! Look and Listen!!!” in a singing mode… He’s now looking on both sides making sure that it’s clear to cross, but sometimes, I still need to remind him. There’s one time, I forgot to do the routine because I can see from afar that it’s safe to cross, he cautioned me, “Daddy, Stoooppp! Stop! Look and Listen first!!!!” hahaha… followed up by saying “That’s dangewoouuss..!” Oh well, I said, “oh, I’m sorry, I forgot about our safety check!”. That’s just one instance, but now when we’re out I always make sure that we do this practice constantly. It’s like making him responsible in a fun and easy way he’ll like it. I believe everybody should have their own safety patrol anywhere and anytime.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
How to Say "No" to your child
This post is in response to gab’s mom’s question from my last blog. As you all know, gab’s mom is also Clarence’s godmother and a good friend of mine. Here’s her question:
"i should start saying NO to him! i'm the mom, yeah? LOL
but wait, he's just 1 and 9 mos, should i let him win for now? ha ha ha! i just thought that he might be too young for a resounding NO! what do you think?"
My last post was on how to deal with your toddler when all you hear from him is “No”. Now, I’ll share with you how to say “No” to your child in other ways. It’s parent’s turn to say “No” in ways that (I believe) will be effective in the child’s development regardless of the age. Constantly saying “No” to your child causes it’s meaning to lose its sense. When your child always hears “No”, “Stop” or “Don’t” he’s most likely to become frustrated or afraid to try new things. He can’t build his confidence when you always think that he can’t be messy, risky or free. Though our objective is to protect our child, it’s still better that he will learn this (our objective) by himself---- on WHY we are resistant in his actions. Consider this example, when your child is about to reach the toilet water, of course, your first response is to say “No!” that’s fine (to say No at his first attempt) but it will be more effective when you support it with an explanation. Like “That’s dirty!” or “Yucky! It will make you sick!” So the next time he goes for the toilet again (which he will surely do), instead of “No”, you can just say “Dirty!”, “Yucky” with an exaggerated disgusted face expression. This will help your child understand WHY, and the toilet will be less attractive for him.
Another example is when your child asks for his toy during meal time, of course you will say No again. No, no and no!... That’s kind of irritating on him also, let’s put ourselves into their shoes, it’s like what we feel when our spouses tell the same thing on us in an argument. So here’s another way you can say No to your child the next time he asks for a toy during meal time. “Okay, son you can have/play your toy but it will be later after you finish your food” or "YES! yes, you'll have your toy once dinner is done". "Okay" and "Yes" are better in hearing for them but you can see there’s still a compromise. It’s a bargain that they will surely accept instead of NO (no toy) at all.
My last example is making yourself responsible as a grown-up. You want to protect your child but you are the one who’s sometimes making things dangerous for him. You don’t like to say No all the time so you have to do something on the things and place your child is wandering. Make his world a childproof environment and his toys safe for him. Like when your child tried to touch an electrical outlet, you’ll be there again to hysterically say “No!” but if you already put outlet plugs on it, there’s no reason for you to worry and your child will be free from hearing the No word constantly. If he kept on going to the kitchen or toilet, you can use toddler SAFETY gates or door knob locks. No one else could know what your child needs to be protected but YOU. Be proactive and Beat the Negative. Yes! It rhymes again.
but wait, he's just 1 and 9 mos, should i let him win for now? ha ha ha! i just thought that he might be too young for a resounding NO! what do you think?"
My last post was on how to deal with your toddler when all you hear from him is “No”. Now, I’ll share with you how to say “No” to your child in other ways. It’s parent’s turn to say “No” in ways that (I believe) will be effective in the child’s development regardless of the age. Constantly saying “No” to your child causes it’s meaning to lose its sense. When your child always hears “No”, “Stop” or “Don’t” he’s most likely to become frustrated or afraid to try new things. He can’t build his confidence when you always think that he can’t be messy, risky or free. Though our objective is to protect our child, it’s still better that he will learn this (our objective) by himself---- on WHY we are resistant in his actions. Consider this example, when your child is about to reach the toilet water, of course, your first response is to say “No!” that’s fine (to say No at his first attempt) but it will be more effective when you support it with an explanation. Like “That’s dirty!” or “Yucky! It will make you sick!” So the next time he goes for the toilet again (which he will surely do), instead of “No”, you can just say “Dirty!”, “Yucky” with an exaggerated disgusted face expression. This will help your child understand WHY, and the toilet will be less attractive for him.
Another example is when your child asks for his toy during meal time, of course you will say No again. No, no and no!... That’s kind of irritating on him also, let’s put ourselves into their shoes, it’s like what we feel when our spouses tell the same thing on us in an argument. So here’s another way you can say No to your child the next time he asks for a toy during meal time. “Okay, son you can have/play your toy but it will be later after you finish your food” or "YES! yes, you'll have your toy once dinner is done". "Okay" and "Yes" are better in hearing for them but you can see there’s still a compromise. It’s a bargain that they will surely accept instead of NO (no toy) at all.
My last example is making yourself responsible as a grown-up. You want to protect your child but you are the one who’s sometimes making things dangerous for him. You don’t like to say No all the time so you have to do something on the things and place your child is wandering. Make his world a childproof environment and his toys safe for him. Like when your child tried to touch an electrical outlet, you’ll be there again to hysterically say “No!” but if you already put outlet plugs on it, there’s no reason for you to worry and your child will be free from hearing the No word constantly. If he kept on going to the kitchen or toilet, you can use toddler SAFETY gates or door knob locks. No one else could know what your child needs to be protected but YOU. Be proactive and Beat the Negative. Yes! It rhymes again.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
The “No” Word!
It seems that toddlers’ first learning words will not be a set if the word NO is not present. For them it’s a powerful word that can put things in the way they want it to be. I believe this is a normal behavior, a stage where things are hard for the parents to handle. You ask something that you’ll like him to do but instead he’ll just stare at you, shakes head or say “NO!” or even ‘better‘ he does the exact opposite of what he was told. 2 to 3 years old are like that as I observed from my own son and his playgroup mates. Some parents shared the same experience. I think this is the stage where our kids wanted to be in control. They want to do things their own way. We can’t blame them. They have their own opinions and ideas. We want them to be independent but we also like them to be mindful of the needs of others, to see danger, to think before they act and to say No in such acceptable ways. Because saying No is also important! For them, to stay away in trouble or bad things when they get older.
But for the meantime, we want of course, to make our kids not to be used in saying this (I could say) a bit negative word. One thing I’ve learned from Janice Simons, one of Clarence's very patient teachers was not to give Clarence an option to say No if we want him to do something. Like, when we’re cleaning up his toys and we want to ask him to put his truck away, we will say, “Where do you want this truck, on the shelf or under your table?” In that way, he has no choice but to keep his truck in either place, and hearing the No word becomes lesser. Two acceptable choices that will also make him decide. In food, he sometimes dislike apple but his only second option is grapes. So I didn’t give him anything bad like cookies as another option. Another thing is when you are asking him to do something that he will resist to do, verbally or physically. Like when I ask him to get a diaper, naturally, he’ll say a really tough NO with a look of determination that’s like he’s not gonna break his final word NO. According to Ms. Peggi Kelly, he’s another strong-willed teacher, you should not give up by you yourself getting the diaper, but instead you’ll make sure that your child is getting the signal you’re passing on him. He should know that you are more determined to get your goal – the Diaper.. LOLs! I mean the idea of your child to follow what has been asked him to do. You should not ignore it by saying “oh well, I’ll get it myself just to make it simple!” which is a big mistake because it will just make a perception to your child that he can manipulate you by just saying No. –And that’s not making your life SIMPLE! Instead, you’ll tell your child that you will get the diaper together and you will help him in finding and pulling it from wherever it is kept. You’ll be surprised that he’ll do it…, with you just watching beside him. It’s a win-win-win game, you get your goal of making him follow you, prevents him in possible manipulating on you and you get the diaper. Say No to Stress, Say Yes to Success!! Hehe It rhymes.
But for the meantime, we want of course, to make our kids not to be used in saying this (I could say) a bit negative word. One thing I’ve learned from Janice Simons, one of Clarence's very patient teachers was not to give Clarence an option to say No if we want him to do something. Like, when we’re cleaning up his toys and we want to ask him to put his truck away, we will say, “Where do you want this truck, on the shelf or under your table?” In that way, he has no choice but to keep his truck in either place, and hearing the No word becomes lesser. Two acceptable choices that will also make him decide. In food, he sometimes dislike apple but his only second option is grapes. So I didn’t give him anything bad like cookies as another option. Another thing is when you are asking him to do something that he will resist to do, verbally or physically. Like when I ask him to get a diaper, naturally, he’ll say a really tough NO with a look of determination that’s like he’s not gonna break his final word NO. According to Ms. Peggi Kelly, he’s another strong-willed teacher, you should not give up by you yourself getting the diaper, but instead you’ll make sure that your child is getting the signal you’re passing on him. He should know that you are more determined to get your goal – the Diaper.. LOLs! I mean the idea of your child to follow what has been asked him to do. You should not ignore it by saying “oh well, I’ll get it myself just to make it simple!” which is a big mistake because it will just make a perception to your child that he can manipulate you by just saying No. –And that’s not making your life SIMPLE! Instead, you’ll tell your child that you will get the diaper together and you will help him in finding and pulling it from wherever it is kept. You’ll be surprised that he’ll do it…, with you just watching beside him. It’s a win-win-win game, you get your goal of making him follow you, prevents him in possible manipulating on you and you get the diaper. Say No to Stress, Say Yes to Success!! Hehe It rhymes.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Terrible Two's
It's what you think that made things happen for you. if you were cautioned by people to wait till your child reaches the age of 2 because that’s when the child becomes a headache to parents, or so as they had called it Terrible Two’s, then the choice is really yours. It’s either you expect things to happen as what these people had set in your mind or you believe in to your own capacity as a parent. It’s better to expect good things than bad about our child. You are the only one who knows your child; other people can’t tell what your child really is capable of. I can say that those are the kinds of people who pretend they know everything. I’d rather set my mind that 2 year olds belong to Terrific Two’s than to what they harshly called it as Terrible. It is what you believe that make things possible. This is my son when he 'was' two years old...
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People who liked this may also like: @ Righteous church goers and
@ Thank You, Daddy!
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People who liked this may also like: @ Righteous church goers and
@ Thank You, Daddy!
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